A wedding by the sea

My college friend Kendal Candice married the love of her life at the Sofitel Philippine Plaza last Monday. The ceremony took place in a garden under the coconut trees, overlooking the sea. It was an afternoon bathed in sunlight, with a cool breeze blowing in our faces. They were blessed with such good weather!

Here I am with my date, waiting for the ceremony to start.

The moment I saw KC walking down the aisle, I burst into tears. I am such a crybaby. But I was relieved I wasn't the only guest weeping!

Isn't the bride gorgeous? And that dress! The crystals on the straps glittered like diamonds in the sun.

The couple's vows made me cry all over again. Beautiful, heartfelt words were exchanged. I was focusing on trying not to bawl like a baby, so no pictures of the couple under the wedding arch, sorry!

I did get this lovey shot as the newlyweds were welcomed by confetti after the recessional! Can you spot the crescent moon?

Cocktails were served before dinner. I was so jealous of Marco and his margarita - no alcohol for me because I'm still nursing little moon.

And here I am with college friend Thea - one of KC's flower girls! You read it right. Instead of assigning little girls, KC got her best buddies as her flower girls! What a crazy but fun idea! (Photo grabbed from Thea, shot by her hubby.)

The reception was held in the Davao Ballroom of Sofitel. The couple got Nyoy Volante to serenade the guests while we ate. The hubby and I didn't stay until the end though, because...

All this time, our trooper of a daughter was in the hotel with our household helper G. The event was an adult affair, so we couldn't bring Ally with us. We couldn't leave her at home either, because we didn't know how long we'd be away. I planned to leave her and G at Gymboree in the hotel, but surprise surprise! It was Gymboree's Christmas party so they were closed! Argh! I didn't know what to do, and was about to panic. Thank God for calm husbands!

We found out there was a playground just beside the garden. That's where Ally and G stayed during the ceremony, and you can bet the little one had fun! We could see her from afar, climbing up and down the steps of the playhouse. Here's a photo of the playground before the event started - that's our baby holding the pink and white balloons.

During cocktail hour, we snuck out to the car so I could nurse the little one. Sofitel doesn't have a nursing station. :(

After Ally had her fill, we whisked them away to Le Bar, one of the swanky hotel restaurants, just above the popular Spiral. I ordered fries and pumpkin soup for the little one, and prayed she'd be preoccupied enough so her daddy and I can proceed to the wedding reception.

Here we are sneaking back to the event. We got to the ballroom just in time - the reception hadn't started yet.

By 7:45pm, Ally had had enough of being away from me for too long, so she decided to cry her lungs out. Haha. Great timing, as we had already finished dinner when we got the text from G. Whew!

This is the first event we've attended without the little one clinging to us. I'm glad to say it was a success! Little moon was well-behaved the entire five hours, and only cried and asked for mommy when it was almost time to leave. Little trooper!

Oh, and this is the first time I've ever posted a photo of my outfit! I wore a pink and white maxi dress from Hip Culture, a beaded headband from SM Department Store, and faux pearls and rhinestones from Forever 21. And for the first time in a long time, I didn't wear flats! I wore these comfy wedges from Celine.

What a fun event! Thank you KC and Manny for having us!

Our breastfeeding story

Nursing our little moon is probably the biggest challenge I have ever been faced with. I do it because I want Ally to receive the best. We've been breastfeeding for a little over 13 months now.

Our breastfeeding journey began the minute I gave birth to her, right there in the delivery room. I wish I could say I remember all the sweet details of our love-at-first-latch, but until this day, the details of my delivery are foggy. I think my subconscious is blocking the memory of that day because child birth is one of the most excruciating experiences ever. I do remember them holding her against my breast, all pink and new and tiny, but I can't remember how she latched on. In the recovery room, I asked the midwife who assisted the Unang Yakap, and she assured me Ally did latch on.

I also wish I could say she never had a drop of formula. But there was a medical complication that disrupted our plans to breastfeed exclusively. A few hours after her birth, the doctor told me she had jaundice. She had to undergo bili light treatment. Instead of being roomed in with me, it was the neonatal ICU for her. So I had to get out of bed hours after delivery, walk to the hallway, sit in a wheel chair (ouch!), and go to the NICU (which was on a different floor). This happened countless of times in a day. I would stay in the NICU nursing room for an hour or two, cuddling and feeding my sweet newborn. My ravenous nursling was so hungry that sometimes, on my way from the NICU back to my room, I would get summoned before I could even step into my room! There was very little rest for me. But I was very determined. Ally was sick, so all the more reason to breastfeed.

Jaundice isn't a cause for alarm, a lot of babies are born yellow - including me! But after a day of treatment, the doctor was concerned that her bilirubin levels weren't returning to normal. It was very scary. She needed all the time she could get under the bili lights, so my short mommy visits were cut even shorter. The lights could cause dehydration, so unlike most newborns who need only a few sips of milk, Ally needed a lot of it, and fast. A new mom doesn't produce milk yet, only colostrum - a nutrient-packed, sticky substance - in very little amounts. Enough for a newborn, but not in Ally's case. Because of the risk of dehydration from the treatment, she needed to be supplemented with formula. I was heartbroken, but there was no choice.

Ally stayed a few more days in the hospital after I was discharged. I'd like to think she was mixed-fed those first few days, because I was expressing milk and delivering it to the NICU. I forced my body to hurry up and produce milk with the help of the hospital's electric Medela pump. Do you know how hard it is for a new mom who just gave birth to produce a drop of milk? It's like trying to squeeze water from a rock! Milk doesn't usually come until a few days after you deliver. But Ally needed me, so I had to produce liquid gold.  It was excruciating.

I had to work hard. There was very little rest at home - I had to manually pump every few hours to establish my milk supply. I had to be diligent with that because breastfeeding works on a supply-and-demand basis. If your body thinks there is no demand (no suckling babe), it will not produce the supply. My milk could easily dry up without Ally directly suckling. Breast pumps are not as efficient as a real baby, so I had to work extra hard. I had to pump every few hours, round the clock. And everyday I would deliver my precious milk in milk bags. Very milk maid-ish, except that I was also the cow.

I am not sure if the nurses actually give her my expressed milk. Would they take the time to thaw frozen or cold breastmilk, when there was a can of formula readily available? Just to be sure Ally was receiving my milk, I would breastfeed her directly every time I visited. I had to limit our time together though, so she could go back under her bili lights. This happened over several days.

This was a very trying experience for me. I was feeling very depressed. I would cry on my way out of the NICU - I wanted my baby! I would cry when I got home - I wanted my husband! (He was in Seattle for work, he didn't have a choice.) It was the loneliest point of my life. If I ever had postpartum depression, that would have been it.  I will never know. Thank God I pulled through.

And thank God Ally was ok. She was discharged a few days later (after 7 days in the NICU), and we began our breastfeeding journey anew. 13 months later, we are still at it.  As the saying goes, if there's a will, there's a way.

So that's how our breastfeeding story began. Although we were off to a rocky start, things got better. There are many ups and downs, but there is nothing like the joy of being able to provide the best for your child. I will share with you more of our experience in future posts.

I would love to hear about your experience! Please share in the comments below!